The Judge from the Marches
Intro
- Storyteller: Filostrato
- Filostrato says that Elissa's earlier tale about Maso del Saggio has made him change his mind about the tale he was going to tell. It's reminded him of another Maso tale.
- Although it has some naughty words in it, Filostrato tells the ladies not to worry—it's just an entertaining little tale.
Story
- The chief magistrates of Florence, Filostrato says, mostly come from an area of Italy called the Marches.
- Because they're cheapskates, they find bottom feeders to bring with them as judges and other officials.
- One of these judges is Messer Niccola and he's a disgusting mess of a man.
- His dress is very unbecoming of a judge: his fur hat is filthy, his judicial robes don't cover much and—wait for it—his pants are on the ground.
- One day, Maso del Saggio happened to be at the court looking for a friend when he saw Messer Niccola on the bench. He couldn't believe his eyes.
- He decides to change his plans and goes to find his partners in crime, Ribi and Matteuzzo.
- When his friends see the comically dressed judge, they can hardly contain themselves. They know they have to come up with some plan to humiliate him in front of the court.
- So the next day, Matteuzzo hides right under the judge's bench where there's a hole conveniently located just below his honor's pants.
- Ribi and Maso pretend to have complaints to lodge against each other and approach the bench to plead with Messer Niccola.
- Ribi pulls Niccola's robe one way and Maso pulls it the other so that the judge's ill-fitting pants are on view to the general public.
- At this moment, Matteuzzo pulls down the judge's pants. With the skimpy robe held open, the judge's entire bottom is on display for all to see.
- Ribi and Maso pretend that Niccola's not doing his job properly and unhand him so they can leave. Matteuzzo gets out of there before he can be seen.
- Messer Niccola's a little slow on the uptake and doesn't realize that Ribi and Maso were in on the prank until it's too late.
- Although he complains to the chief magistrate about the humiliation, the chief realizes that the reason for the prank was to show the stupidity of his judges—so he has to let it go.