How we cite our quotes: (Part.Paragraph)
Quote #1
The consequence of my constant absence, though, is that the other Abnegation are wary of me, convinced there's something wrong with me, that I'm ill or immoral or strange. (1.18)
This is part of Marcus's cycle of abuse. He keeps Tobias at home, making people think he's weird. Because people think he's weird, Tobias is more likely to stay at home, by himself. When he's by himself, he's easier to control.
Quote #2
"Some of my fellow council members are coming over tonight, so you should eat dinner early." (1.79)
In other words, Marcus keeps Tobias out of sight and out of mind. It's like he doesn't even exist.
Quote #3
I'm enclosed in a box large enough only for my body. […] I can't breathe anymore. I can't breathe. (1.286)
One of Tobias's fears is claustrophobia, and part of that fear comes from a fear of isolation.
Quote #4
I shrug. "I'm used to being alone." (2.11)
A benefit to Tobias/Four's lifetime of isolation is that being alone doesn't bother him. He's able to turn that aspect of his abuse into strength.
Quote #5
Unlike my outgoing fellow initiates, I wanted to live alone. (3.2)
Four is one of the only initiates to move into an apartment by himself. As we saw from the quote in Part 2, he likes being alone. Social interaction is awkward to him.
Quote #6
The others […] grew up surrounded by Dauntless community, and to them the silence and the stillness of living alone would be unbearable. (3.2)
Four contrasts himself with the gregarious Dauntless, but Tris was also raised in Abnegation. She has an easier time blending in than Four does.
Quote #7
I've never even though about whether I wanted to date anyone; it was such an impossibility. (3.54)
This is so sad! Marcus's abuse has "succeeded" here, making sure that Tobias/Four has so little self-esteem that he wants to just stay by himself.
Quote #8
[Zeke] opens a door, letting faint light in so we can see where we are. We're on the other side of the chasm, several feet about the water. […] The people milling around near the railing are small and dark, impossible to distinguish from this distance. (3.338)
Four learns that he can have friends and still have lovely little moments of privacy, like this in a secret location Zeke finds for them to hang out.
Quote #9
Two years ago, when I was an initiate, I pretended my own Visiting Day didn't exist, holed up in the training room with a punching bag. (4.2)
Four is acting like he's changed, but he really hasn't. He still avoids Visiting Day. But to his credit, he doesn't have anyone to visit him anyway.
Quote #10
One Abnegation, five Candor, two Erudite. Those are my initiates. (6.1)
This reminds us that Tris is all alone when she jumps (literally) into Dauntless. She's the only transfer in her faction. Unlike Four, who faced the same issue two years ago, however, she's able to overcome the isolation fairly quickly and make friends.