Baby Is Three
- A young teen with a totally abrasive attitude walks into the office of a psychotherapist, Stern.
- Stern tells him to sit down, calling him "Sonny" due to his youth. The teen argues he shouldn't be called that. He tells Stern he's fifteen but doesn't have to like it. Gerry also tells him his name is Gerard Gerard. Uh-oh, here we go.
- The psychotherapist is like, What? The teen says it's not his real name and tells Stern not to ask where he lives. Stern is like, This is not going to go anywhere if you keep this up.
- Gerry takes out a thousand-dollar bill and figures that should take care of things.
- Before the psychotherapist is able to pick up the money, Gerry tells him to leave it alone until he, Gerry, makes sure they can work together. But Stern says he doesn't do business this way. Gerry says they have to, if they want to work together.
- Stern asks where Gerry got a thousand dollars. The teen says he won a contest and insists it's the truth. The psychotherapist says okay blandly and stumps Gerry by waiting for him to continue.
- The teen asks if their conversation is legally protected, the way conversations with priests and lawyers are. (Or were at the time the novel was written. The right has arguably been taken away by the U.S. federal government via the Patriot Act.)
- Stern says the conversation is protected no matter what. Gerry tells him to pick up the money.
- The psychotherapist says that's up to him, and that you can't just buy therapy treatments. They have to work together. This is obviously going to be a battle. But eventually Stern takes the cash.
- The teen asks what to do first. Stern says they already started. They talk about how Gerry chose Stern. Gerry says he heard the psychotherapist has the ability to predict what people will do and give them advice about it. They discuss how Stern developed an eye for details and made enough mistakes so that he could do that.
- They talk some more, and Gerry says the conversation isn't getting them anywhere. Stern shrugs and says it depends on where the teen wants to go. He asks Gerry what he currently believes psychiatry is. The teen answers by simply saying he doesn't "get" Stern.