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Cashier

Bell Curve

1
5%

You get caught on a webcam pilfering; one day you just had one too many "beeps" and began to sift a bit of dough. You didn't realize it at the time, but Mr. Computer knows when things don't add up. Now, with thousands stolen over time, you’re facing grand larceny charges. Say hi to Big Bubba on your first date in prison.

2
25%

You tried. You came, you cashiered…you cratered. Amazon crushed your store's profit margins—it had none—so it closed. You went job to job and finally, after 20 years, got a nice gig as a plumber's assistant where you never again have to hear the "beeps."

3
50%

You're a union cashier. You made decent money for decades, got to know the locals who liked you. Every now and then you went the extra mile to help bag or escort a little old lady to her car in the rain. It was a nice life. But not what you dreamed about doing when you were nine. 

4
75%

You worked as a cashier in a casino—one day, by pure dumb luck, some drunkenly generous gambler in the establishment hit it big and gave you a $100,000 tip. You quit on the spot. (It will only be enough to last you a couple of years, but you'll figure out the next step later.) 

5
95%

You got tired of cashiering and one day realized that the whole back end of the store wasn't all that hard to run. So you spent 18 months getting to know every facet of the store's operations. You then moved 20 miles away and set up a similar store; then another; then another—today you own your own chain of specialty grocery stores and have entirely automated non-union cash registers. You finally put the "cash" in "cashier."

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