Yeah, yeah: it depends on how long you've been at it, what city you live in, what type of company or organization you're doing it for…lots of factors. There's also the question of salary vs. commission vs. bonuses…again, factors galore. But the top ten jobs on the pay scale usually go something like this:

1. Professional athlete.

First Year's Earnings: $400,000 – $5.2 million (the exact number will depend on what sport you play— basketball players earn more than tennis players, for example—and how badly your team wants you to play for them).

Lifetime earnings (until you blow out a kneecap or hurt your arm): $2.6 million –$24.96 million

2. Baseball Manager

First Year's Earnings: $825,000

Lifetime earnings (until you get fired for not winning enough): $3,300,000

3. Brain Surgeon

First Year's Earnings: $535,400

Lifetime earnings $16,349,000

4. NASCAR Racecar Driver

First Year's Earnings:: $500,000

Lifetime earnings $12,500,000

5. Anesthesiologist

First Year's Earnings:: $431,980

Lifetime earnings $15,088,000

6. Cosmetic Surgeon (in California, near Los Angeles or Beverly Hills)

First Year's Earnings: $408,000

Lifetime earnings $17,033,184

7. Ophthalmologist

First Year's Earnings: $263,322

Lifetime earnings $10,993,166

8. Hedge Fund Manager

First Year's Earnings: $312,330

Lifetime earnings $13,039,000

9. Pathologist

First Year's Earnings: $258,000

Lifetime earnings $10,770,984

10. Dermatologist

First Year's Earnings: $306,210

Lifetime earnings $10,695,000

And which jobs will leave you shivering in a tiny apartment with six roommates? Most years, the top ten lowest paying jobs look a little something like this. (P.S. We're not including jobs with an income of zero, like, say, exorcist or monk. And, of course, we're not taking into consideration things like the fact that an au pair probably gets free room an board.)

1. Mall Santa

First Year's Earnings: $9,000 (for a few months of work; there's not much demand for Santa in June)

Lifetime earnings $375,732

2. Crossword Puzzle Writer

First Year's Earnings: $10,000

Lifetime earnings $40,000

3. Doctor Without Borders

First Year's Earnings: $18,252

Lifetime earnings $761,984

4. Waiter

First Year's Earnings: $18,540

Lifetime earnings $774,000

5. Model

First Year's Earnings: $18,750

Lifetime earnings $783,000

6. Bartender

First Year's Earnings: $18,900

Lifetime earnings $789,000

7. Cashier

First Year's Earnings: $18,970

Lifetime earnings $792,000

8. Stand-up Comedian

First Year's Earnings: $20,000

Lifetime earnings $700,000

9. Figure Skater

First Year's Earnings: $20,000

Lifetime earnings $834,960

10. Au Pair/Nanny

First Year's Earnings: $20,000

Lifetime earnings $500,000

And since a list wouldn't be a list without a bunch of disclaimers at the end, here they are (in addition to the ones we already threw your way):

• There are exceptions. Most writers, for example, are living on peanuts, but then there's J.K. Rowling. The average model earns less than $20,000, but a lucky few make millions.
• The best and worst paying jobs change over time. In the 1800s, for example, you could make a decent living as a milliner (a hat maker). People had a thing for hats back then, apparently. Today, hats are mass produced in factories so there aren't many rich milliners. By the time you're ready to start work, the world may have changed enough that some of the jobs that are well-paying right now won't be—or may have been replaced by robots.
• You can't just look at the highest paying job on the list and say "I'm going to be that when I grow up." That's not how it works. Most of these highest paying jobs required super specialized skills that most people just don't have.