Pride and Prejudice Quotes
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Hurrying instantly to her husband, [Mrs. Bennet] called out as she entered the library, "Oh! Mr. Bennet, you are wanted immediately; we are all in an uproar. You must come and make Lizzy marry Mr. Collins, for she vows she will not have him, and if you do not make haste he will change his mind and not have her."
Mr. Bennet raised his eyes from his book as she entered, and fixed them on her face with a calm unconcern which was not in the least altered by her communication.
"I have not the pleasure of understanding you," said he, when she had finished her speech. "Of what are you talking?"
Context
This line is from the novel Pride and Prejudice, written by Jane Austen (1813).
If you've ever read Pride and Prejudice (or just seen one of the movie versions), you know that one of Mr. Bennet's favorite pastimes is picking on his hysterical wife, Mrs. Bennet. In this scene, she's all in a panic because her daughter, Lizzy, won't agree to marry Mr. Collins. Mr. Collins is a bit of a dud, so we can't say we blame her, but all Mrs. Bennet sees is a single man in possession of a good fortune about to get away, and she needs Mr. Bennet to get on the case. Like now!
But Mr. Bennet was never one to let the chance for a zinger pass by. So when his wife rushes into his library freaking out, he just looks up from his book and basically tells her, "I don't have the slightest clue what you're talking about." Sure, Mrs. Bennet is annoying, but his comment is pretty dismissive. This is serious stuff, Mr. Bennet. The time to start engaging in active parenting is now. You know, before (spoiler alert!) your youngest daughter runs off with that scoundrel, Mr. Wickham.
Where you've heard it
Anytime someone is bringing the snark at a meeting of the Jane Austen Society of North America. Or maybe right before the Jane Austen Fight Club is about to throw down?
Pretentious Factor
If you were to drop this quote at a dinner party, would you get an in-unison "awww" or would everyone roll their eyes and never invite you back? Here it is, on a scale of 1-10.
Is this pretentious? Yeah, it's a little snobby to tell someone that you don't have "the pleasure of understanding" them. But you know what? Do it anyway because it's actually a pretty sick 19th-century burn.