The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down Family Quotes

Nao Kao and Foua would do anything for Lia. Though this urge leads them to take some actions that we wouldn't exactly call brilliant in the grand scheme of things, it's also the only thing keeping their family together through hard times.

This would be rough for any parent, but it's particularly hard on Foua. In Laos, Foua was with her children twenty-four hours a day—she even carried them while she worked the fields. Now that she's in America, however, Foua feels like her children are being taken from her, and Lia's illness makes that all the more bitter.

Nao Kao and Foua are exceptional parents, even by Hmong standards. While many a Hmong have a somewhat disappointing hierarchy of importance based on the gender spectrum, this family doesn't care if their children are boys, girls, or anything in between: they just want them to be happy and healthy. Sadly, Lia is neither, which gives all that well-meaning parenthood a run for its money.

They might have a point with this one: Lia always seems to feel better when she's home with her family. You might attribute this to traditional Hmong treatments (as Nao Kao and Foua do) or you might attribute it to psychology, but it's difficult to deny that Lia needs her family.

Cue the prejudice bell. Just in a totally different context here. In many ways, the Lees become the family Jeanine wished she had. They don't judge her for her choices. They don't value their beliefs over their children. They love unconditionally. For Jeanine, this is like finding a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow.

This is staggering. Although the Lees went through some seriously awful stuff on the road to Thailand—war, fleeing their country, and losing a child—Foua is far more devastated by Lia's sickness. And it's only made worse by the fact that this is happening in America, the "promised land" for many Hmong refugees fleeing their war-town homeland. It isn't exactly living up to its promise.

Pretty powerful image, dontcha think? In many ways, Foua views Lia as an extension of herself and she's always willing to sacrifice her own well-being for her daughter's. You can attribute that to Hmong culture if you'd like, but we think that Foua is just one cool lady. And it's not even a helicopter-mom sorta thing—this kid is sick, and her mom is doing what she's got to.

How heart-warming. The Lees never look at Lia as a burden, instead treating her condition like a badge of honor. As an author from an American background, Anne Fadiman can see the contrast that poses to some U.S. families that might react differently to a disability. Kinda makes you think about certain cultural values, eh?

How often do you hear something like that from an American teenager? Despite the fact that their childhood was filled more medical chaos than an episode of House, the Lee children only love their family more for the struggle. Oh jeez, is someone cutting an onion in here?

Family isn't always about blood—sometimes it's simply about love. Foua and Nao Kao are more than happy to spread the love to anyone willing to spread it back. Which shows that in the end, they made Jeanine's life a lot better simply by being a part of it. And that makes it all the sadder when she passes away, but it's one relationship in this book full of prejudice that shows a successful bond across cultural difference.