How It All Goes Down
- When Elizabeth comes back to the inn, she finds two letters from Jane. It's not good news.
- Turns out Lydia has run away to marry Mr. Wickham. That, or she's been kidnapped, and Mr. Wickham is going to murder her. Either way, it's very bad.
- Elizabeth is about to rush to find her aunt and uncle when Mr. Darcy walks in.
- Elizabeth tells Mr. Darcy everything, and he heads out as soon as he hears. Well, there goes any chance Elizabeth might have had of rekindling that spark.
- When the Gardiners come back to the inn, they pack up everything and head back to Hertfordshire to see what can be done to save Lydia from the villainous Mr. Wickham.
- The Gardiners and Elizabeth head back to Hertfordshire. On the way, they discuss their theories about Lydia and Wickham—and pass by a battlefield littered with bodies. Gross.
- At Longbourn, Elizabeth gets the rundown from Jane.
- Basically, Lydia ran off with Mr. Wickham and intended to marry him in Scotland. Colonel Forester chased after them, but Mr. Wickham shot at the colonel, and the couple didn't end up going to Scotland—and didn't end up getting married. They're hiding out somewhere in London.
- Mr. Bennet is there trying to find the two of them right now.
- Mary and Kitty have sworn blood oaths to kill Mr. Wickham.
- Mrs. Bennet is up in her room freaking out and vomiting all over the place.
- In short, it's not a pretty sight in the Bennet household.
- So, Mr. Gardiner heads to London to join Mr. Bennet in searching for Mr. Wickham.
- As the girls wait at home, a letter arrives from Mr. Collins. It says that he's sorry about the whole Lydia business. It also says that Charlotte is dead (who knew she was a zombie all along?).
- Mr. Bennet comes back from London and joins the family at home. He's pretty bummed about how things have turned out. Maybe it was a mistake to raise his daughters to be warriors instead of teaching them about the world?
- And everyone just sits and waits for more news. Waiting is the hardest part.
- Two days after Mr. Bennet gets back, good news follows him.
- It seems that Mr. Gardiner was able to track down Mr. Wickham and Lydia. They're not married, but they plan to be.
- Mr. Wickham and Lydia have to get married in London, though, because Mr. Wickham's been injured in a terrible carriage accident. He'll probably never walk again. Luckily, he'll have Lydia to care for him for the rest of his life.
- Wow. So lucky.
- Mr. Bennet thinks it's all a little fishy. He thinks Mr. Gardiner must have paid Mr. Wickham a lot of money to marry Lydia.
- But Mrs. Bennet is thrilled. She even stops vomiting.
- Jane and Elizabeth are just glad the whole family drama is over. Now Mary and Kitty won't have to kill Mr. Wickham, after all. That's nice.
- Eventually, everyone hears that Lydia and Mr. Wickham are gonna get hitched, which is good for the Bennet family, because the whole thing isn't such a scandal anymore.
- Elizabeth also thinks about Mr. Darcy. There's no way he'd ever want to marry her now and have Mr. Wickham for a brother-in-law.
- It's a shame, because Elizabeth just realized that she and Mr. Darcy would be kind of perfect for each other. They could travel all over England fighting zombies side by side.
- Mr. Gardiner writes to say that Lydia and Mr. Wickham are headed to Ireland. Mr. Wickham is going to be a clergyman. Good luck with that profession.
- Lydia would like to stop by Longbourn before she leaves the country, though. That's cool with everyone she nearly disgraced, right?