A side-by-side translation of Act 1, Scene 3 of Much Ado About Nothing from the original Shakespeare into modern English.
Original Text |
Translated Text |
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| Source: Folger Shakespeare Library | |
Enter Sir John the Bastard, and Conrade, his | |
CONRADE What the goodyear, my lord, why are you DON JOHN There is no measure in the occasion that CONRADE You should hear reason. 5 DON JOHN And when I have heard it, what blessing CONRADE If not a present remedy, at least a patient | Don John is being a his usual negative self, so his attendant Conrade tries to placate him with platitudes. (How’s that for vocab enrichment!) |
DON JOHN I wonder that thou, being, as thou sayst thou | Don John wonders how Conrade can be chipper when he was supposedly born under Saturn. Um...what? Elizabethan Astrology 101: Saturn was thought to be the planet farthest from the sun, and thus the coldest and grumpiest planet to be born under. Don John says there's no point trying to cheer him. When he’s cranky, he’s not going to hide it. He eats when he’s hungry, sleeps only when he’s tired, and isn’t going grin like a clown when he's upset. So there. |
CONRADE Yea, but you must not make the full show of DON JOHN I had rather be a canker in a hedge than a 25 | Conrade’s serious about turning Don John's frown upside down. He reminds Don John that he only recently reconciled with his brother, the Prince (Don Pedro), after challenging him for the crown. But that reconciliation isn't going to last if he can't play nice. Don John says that he'd rather be genuine than pretend to be his brother's BFF, even if that would make him look good. If nothing else, he says, at least he's honest. He acts like a villain because he is a villain, and he doesn’t care whether he’s hated. Being on the outside suits him. He hates that his brother is pretending to trust him now. He's like a dog whose owner says, "He doesn't bite," but then still insists he wear a muzzle. He feels like a caged bird, and he's not going to sing just to make his brother happy. |
CONRADE Can you make no use of your discontent? DON JOHN I make all use of it, for I use it only. Who Enter Borachio. What news, Borachio? BORACHIO I came yonder from a great supper. The 40 DON JOHN Will it serve for any model to build mischief BORACHIO Marry, it is your brother’s right hand. DON JOHN Who, the most exquisite Claudio? BORACHIO Even he. DON JOHN A proper squire. And who, and who? Which 50 BORACHIO Marry, on Hero, the daughter and heir of DON JOHN A very forward March chick! How came you | Don John doesn’t deny, though, that his brother’s precautions are reasonable ones, as he would like to do some mischief as soon as he gets the chance. (Plotline of the play = Don John’s chance to do mischief.) Borachio enters and delivers to Don John news of an impending marriage. |
BORACHIO Being entertained for a perfumer, as I was | Borachio was perfuming a smelly room by burning some incense when he heard Claudio and Don Pedro approach, deep in conversation. Borachio got the gist of the conversation correctly (unlike Antonio’s man) about Don Pedro’s plan to court Hero on Claudio’s behalf. This is kind of a Tarantino approach to the wooing of Hero, which we now see is the focus of approximately eight million schemes from her dad, Don John, and of course Claudio and Don Pedro. |
DON JOHN Come, come, let us thither. This may prove CONRADE To the death, my lord. DON JOHN Let us to the great supper. Their cheer is the BORACHIO We’ll wait upon your Lordship. They exit. | Don John is elated to hear news of this little plan between Don Pedro and Claudio, especially as he blames Claudio for playing a large part in overthrowing him in a vaguely-mentioned rebellion. (Some scholars think this alludes to the battle that took place before the play’s first scene, which may have been a contest between Don Pedro and Don John for power.) The men exit, plotting their mischief, though we think Shakespeare may be gearing up with a lot of sardoodledom (that's a fun theater word for melodrama). |