Much Ado About Nothing: Act 5, Scene 1 Translation

A side-by-side translation of Act 5, Scene 1 of Much Ado About Nothing from the original Shakespeare into modern English.

Original Text	Translated Text
Source: Folger Shakespeare Library
Enter Leonato and his brother. LEONATO’S BROTHER If you go on thus, you will kill yourself, And ’tis not wisdom thus to second grief Against yourself. LEONATO I pray thee, cease thy counsel, Which falls into mine ears as profitless 5 As water in a sieve. Give not me counsel, Nor let no comforter delight mine ear But such a one whose wrongs do suit with mine. Bring me a father that so loved his child, Whose joy of her is overwhelmed like mine, 10 And bid him speak of patience. Measure his woe the length and breadth of mine, And let it answer every strain for strain, As thus for thus, and such a grief for such, In every lineament, branch, shape, and form. 15 If such a one will smile and stroke his beard, Bid sorrow wag, cry “hem” when he should groan, Patch grief with proverbs, make misfortune drunk With candle-wasters, bring him yet to me, 20 And I of him will gather patience. But there is no such man. For, brother, men Can counsel and speak comfort to that grief Which they themselves not feel, but tasting it, Their counsel turns to passion, which before 25 Would give preceptial med’cine to rage, Fetter strong madness in a silken thread, Charm ache with air and agony with words. No, no, ’tis all men’s office to speak patience To those that wring under the load of sorrow, 30 But no man’s virtue nor sufficiency To be so moral when he shall endure The like himself. Therefore give me no counsel. My griefs cry louder than advertisement. LEONATO’S BROTHER Therein do men from children nothing differ. 35 LEONATO I pray thee, peace. I will be flesh and blood, For there was never yet philosopher That could endure the toothache patiently, However they have writ the style of gods And made a push at chance and sufferance. 40	Leonato's Brother, Antonio, confronts the grieving Leonato and pleads with him not to be so suicidal. Leonato claims his brother can say nothing to make him happy again—he can only be consoled by someone who's gone through exactly what he's going through right now. He also says it's easy for people who have it good to give advice, which is more of him telling his brother, "You have no idea how I feel, so stop trying to tell me what to do." Leonato's main point here is that he feels perfectly justified in crying. After all, even philosophers, for all their philosophizing, whine when they have a toothache.
LEONATO’S BROTHER Yet bend not all the harm upon yourself. Make those that do offend you suffer too. LEONATO There thou speak’st reason. Nay, I will do so. My soul doth tell me Hero is belied, And that shall Claudio know; so shall the Prince 45 And all of them that thus dishonor her.	Antonio points out that Leonato is justified in his suffering, but he shouldn't suffer alone. He should share his suffering with the people who are responsible for it. (Basically, go beat Hero's accusers to a pulp.) Leonato agrees.
Enter Prince and Claudio. LEONATO’S BROTHER Here comes the Prince and Claudio hastily. PRINCE Good e’en, good e’en. CLAUDIO Good day to both of you. LEONATO Hear you, my lords— 50 PRINCE We have some haste, Leonato. LEONATO Some haste, my lord! Well, fare you well, my lord. Are you so hasty now? Well, all is one. PRINCE Nay, do not quarrel with us, good old man. 55 LEONATO’S BROTHER If he could right himself with quarrelling, Some of us would lie low. CLAUDIO Who wrongs him? LEONATO Marry, thou dost wrong me, thou dissembler, thou. Nay, never lay thy hand upon thy sword. 60 I fear thee not. CLAUDIO Marry, beshrew my hand If it should give your age such cause of fear. In faith, my hand meant nothing to my sword. LEONATO Tush, tush, man, never fleer and jest at me. 65 I speak not like a dotard nor a fool, As under privilege of age to brag What I have done being young, or what would do Were I not old. Know, Claudio, to thy head, Thou hast so wronged mine innocent child and me 70 That I am forced to lay my reverence by, And with gray hairs and bruise of many days Do challenge thee to trial of a man. I say thou hast belied mine innocent child. Thy slander hath gone through and through her 75 heart, And she lies buried with her ancestors, O, in a tomb where never scandal slept, Save this of hers, framed by thy villainy.	When Claudio and Don Pedro wander on to the scene, Leonato tries to pick a fight with them, but they claim to be in a hurry to go somewhere. Leonato thinks he sees Claudio put his hand on his sword and declares, "I'm not scared of you!" Claudio explains that Leonato is mistaken. He wasn't reaching for his sword, and he’s not really interested in beating up senior citizens. Leonato says that he may be old, but he’s still a mean swordsman and he's ready to fight. He says that Claudio has no choice but to lay aside the gentle reverence of elderly people. Claudio has wrongly framed his child, and sent her to the family tomb, borne by false scandal, and Leonato is ready to fight him on her behalf.
CLAUDIO My villainy? 80 LEONATO Thine, Claudio, thine, I say. PRINCE You say not right, old man. LEONATO My lord, my lord, I’ll prove it on his body if he dare, Despite his nice fence and his active practice, 85 His May of youth and bloom of lustihood. CLAUDIO Away! I will not have to do with you. LEONATO Canst thou so daff me? Thou hast killed my child. If thou kill’st me, boy, thou shalt kill a man. LEONATO’S BROTHER He shall kill two of us, and men indeed, 90 But that’s no matter. Let him kill one first. Win me and wear me! Let him answer me.— Come, follow me, boy. Come, sir boy, come, follow me. Sir boy, I’ll whip you from your foining fence, 95 Nay, as I am a gentleman, I will. LEONATO Brother— LEONATO’S BROTHER Content yourself. God knows I loved my niece, And she is dead, slandered to death by villains That dare as well answer a man indeed 100 As I dare take a serpent by the tongue.— Boys, apes, braggarts, jacks, milksops! LEONATO Brother Anthony—	Claudio is surprised that he's being accused of doing anything wrong. He swears didn’t lie about Hero, and only charged her with things he had proof of. But Leonato and Antonio—especially Antonio—are really itching for a fight on behalf of Hero’s honor. (You know someone's pretty angry when they go all the way to "milksop.")
LEONATO’S BROTHER Hold you content. What, man! I know them, yea, And what they weigh, even to the utmost scruple— 105 Scambling, outfacing, fashionmonging boys, That lie and cog and flout, deprave and slander, Go anticly and show outward hideousness, And speak off half a dozen dang’rous words How they might hurt their enemies, if they durst, 110 And this is all. LEONATO But brother Anthony— LEONATO’S BROTHER Come, ’tis no matter. Do not you meddle. Let me deal in this. PRINCE Gentlemen both, we will not wake your patience. 115 My heart is sorry for your daughter’s death, But, on my honor, she was charged with nothing But what was true and very full of proof. LEONATO My lord, my lord— PRINCE I will not hear you. 120 LEONATO No? Come, brother, away. I will be heard. LEONATO’S BROTHER And shall, or some of us will smart for it. Leonato and his brother exit.	Antonio declares he knows these young boys. They’re the types who go around threatening others, and generally trying to seem really tough, but they’re just full of hot air. Prince Don Pedro attempts to diffuse the situation; he says he’s sorry for Hero’s death, but the men need to realize that the accusation against Hero was proven true. Don Pedro refuses to hear Leonato’s appeals. Leonato and Antonio leave, spitting out a whirlwind of threats.
Enter Benedick. PRINCE See, see, here comes the man we went to seek. CLAUDIO Now, signior, what news? BENEDICK, to Prince Good day, my lord. 125 PRINCE Welcome, signior. You are almost come to part almost a fray. CLAUDIO We had like to have had our two noses snapped off with two old men without teeth. PRINCE Leonato and his brother. What think’st thou? 130 Had we fought, I doubt we should have been too young for them. BENEDICK In a false quarrel there is no true valor. I came to seek you both. CLAUDIO We have been up and down to seek thee, for 135 we are high-proof melancholy and would fain have it beaten away. Wilt thou use thy wit? BENEDICK It is in my scabbard. Shall I draw it? PRINCE Dost thou wear thy wit by thy side? CLAUDIO Never any did so, though very many have 140 been beside their wit. I will bid thee draw, as we do the minstrels: draw to pleasure us. PRINCE As I am an honest man, he looks pale.—Art thou sick, or angry? CLAUDIO, to Benedick What, courage, man! What 145 though care killed a cat? Thou hast mettle enough in thee to kill care. BENEDICK Sir, I shall meet your wit in the career, an you charge it against me. I pray you, choose another subject. 150 CLAUDIO, to Prince Nay, then, give him another staff. This last was broke ’cross. PRINCE By this light, he changes more and more. I think he be angry indeed. CLAUDIO If he be, he knows how to turn his girdle. 155 BENEDICK Shall I speak a word in your ear? CLAUDIO God bless me from a challenge! BENEDICK, aside to Claudio You are a villain. I jest not. I will make it good how you dare, with what you dare, and when you dare. Do me right, or I will 160 protest your cowardice. You have killed a sweet lady, and her death shall fall heavy on you. Let me hear from you.	Don Pedro and Claudio seem unfazed by the encounter. They tell Benedick they narrowly avoided a fight with two old, toothless men. Then they say they came to find Benedick to lighten their spirits. Benedick, however, is all business. They tease that Benedick looks rather angry, but they don’t get just how angry until Benedick pulls Claudio aside and tells him what’s what in a rather threatening way. Benedick calmly asserts that Claudio is a villain and is responsible for the wrongful death of Hero. He challenges Claudio to a duel and says that if Claudio backs down, Benedick will declare him a coward.
CLAUDIO Well, I will meet you, so I may have good cheer. 165 PRINCE What, a feast, a feast? CLAUDIO I’ faith, I thank him. He hath bid me to a calf’s head and a capon, the which if I do not carve most curiously, say my knife’s naught. Shall I not find a woodcock too? 170 BENEDICK Sir, your wit ambles well; it goes easily. PRINCE I’ll tell thee how Beatrice praised thy wit the other day. I said thou hadst a fine wit. “True,” said she, “a fine little one.” “No,” said I, “a great wit.” “Right,” says she, “a great gross one.” “Nay,” said I, 175 “a good wit.” “Just,” said she, “it hurts nobody.” “Nay,” said I, “the gentleman is wise.” “Certain,” said she, “a wise gentleman.” “Nay,” said I, “he hath the tongues.” “That I believe,” said she, “for he swore a thing to me on Monday night which he 180 forswore on Tuesday morning; there’s a double tongue, there’s two tongues.” Thus did she an hour together transshape thy particular virtues. Yet at last she concluded with a sigh, thou wast the proper’st man in Italy. 185 CLAUDIO For the which she wept heartily and said she cared not. PRINCE Yea, that she did. But yet for all that, an if she did not hate him deadly, she would love him dearly. The old man’s daughter told us all. 190 CLAUDIO All, all. And, moreover, God saw him when he was hid in the garden. PRINCE But when shall we set the savage bull’s horns on the sensible Benedick’s head? CLAUDIO Yea, and text underneath: “Here dwells Benedick, 195 the married man”?	Claudio doesn’t seem to take Benedick’s threat very seriously. Claudio makes light of the situation, vaguely saying to Don Pedro that Benedick has accused him of being all kinds of stupid. Don Pedro and Claudio then launch into a series of silly taunts about Beatrice’s love for Benedick, which they claim they heard from Hero (who is to their knowledge, dead, so they’re being pretty insensitive). Finally, they ridicule Benedick, saying that when he marries Beatrice, he’ll be hung with cuckold’s horns, though he claimed to once be an untameable bull.
BENEDICK Fare you well, boy. You know my mind. I will leave you now to your gossip-like humor. You break jests as braggarts do their blades, which, God be thanked, hurt not.—My lord, for your many 200 courtesies I thank you. I must discontinue your company. Your brother the Bastard is fled from Messina. You have among you killed a sweet and innocent lady. For my Lord Lackbeard there, he and I shall meet, and till then peace be with him. 205 Benedick exits.	Benedick isn't amused. He says the men may be full of jokes now, but they’re like braggarts who talk big, but don’t know how to use a sword. He then thanks the Prince for his many courtesies, but he says he’ll have to part ways with him from here on out, adding, "Oh, by the way, your brother has fled the city, and all three of you are responsible for Hero's death. Ta ta."
PRINCE He is in earnest. CLAUDIO In most profound earnest, and, I’ll warrant you, for the love of Beatrice. PRINCE And hath challenged thee? CLAUDIO Most sincerely. 210 PRINCE What a pretty thing man is when he goes in his doublet and hose and leaves off his wit! CLAUDIO He is then a giant to an ape; but then is an ape a doctor to such a man. PRINCE But soft you, let me be. Pluck up, my heart, 215 and be sad. Did he not say my brother was fled? Enter Constables Dogberry and Verges, and the Watch, with Conrade and Borachio.	Prince Don Pedro and Claudio are left alone to wonder at all this very serious business from Benedick. He seems to be earnest in his love for Beatrice and his challenge on Claudio’s life, which is way more seriousness than they're used to from him. As Don Pedro wonders about why his brother suddenly skipped town, Dogberry and company enter to clear up the matter...maybe.
DOGBERRY Come you, sir. If justice cannot tame you, she shall ne’er weigh more reasons in her balance. Nay, an you be a cursing hypocrite once, you must be looked to. 220 PRINCE How now, two of my brother’s men bound? Borachio one! CLAUDIO Hearken after their offense, my lord. PRINCE Officers, what offense have these men done? DOGBERRY Marry, sir, they have committed false 225 report; moreover, they have spoken untruths; secondarily, they are slanders; sixth and lastly, they have belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust things; and, to conclude, they are lying knaves. PRINCE First, I ask thee what they have done; thirdly, I 230 ask thee what’s their offense; sixth and lastly, why they are committed; and, to conclude, what you lay to their charge. CLAUDIO Rightly reasoned, and in his own division; and, by my troth, there’s one meaning well suited. 235 PRINCE, to Borachio and Conrade Who have you offended, masters, that you are thus bound to your answer? This learned constable is too cunning to be understood. What’s your offense?	Prince Don Pedro recognizes Conrade and Borachio as the henchmen of his brother, Don John. He wonders at what offense the men committed in order to be brought forth in chains. Dogberry, as usual, muddles his explanation. After playing with Dogberry for a bit, Don Pedro finally asks Borachio and Conrade what they've done.
BORACHIO Sweet prince, let me go no farther to mine 240 answer. Do you hear me, and let this count kill me. I have deceived even your very eyes. What your wisdoms could not discover, these shallow fools have brought to light, who in the night overheard me confessing to this man how Don John your 245 brother incensed me to slander the Lady Hero, how you were brought into the orchard and saw me court Margaret in Hero’s garments, how you disgraced her when you should marry her. My villainy they have upon record, which I had rather seal with 250 my death than repeat over to my shame. The lady is dead upon mine and my master’s false accusation. And, briefly, I desire nothing but the reward of a villain. PRINCE, to Claudio Runs not this speech like iron through your blood? 255 CLAUDIO I have drunk poison whiles he uttered it. PRINCE, to Borachio But did my brother set thee on to this? BORACHIO Yea, and paid me richly for the practice of it. PRINCE He is composed and framed of treachery, 260 And fled he is upon this villainy.	Borachio breaks the mood of merriment, and reveals the truth, even though he’s scared Claudio will kill him. Borachio says he would have gotten away with the scheme if it hadn't been for the Scooby gang. The watchmen heard him brag to Conrade about the counterfeit scene where Borachio courted Margaret, who posed as Hero. Borachio admits this very scene was at the root of many evils: Hero’s undoing, Claudio’s denouncement of Hero, and Hero’s subsequent death. He's actually really sorry and says he deserves to be punished. Prince Don Pedro and Claudio are shocked, and Don Pedro asks again for confirmation that this was all Don John’s doing. Borachio admits he was paid handsomely by Don John for his wrongdoing. Now Don Pedro understands why Don John was so quick to skip town.
CLAUDIO Sweet Hero, now thy image doth appear In the rare semblance that I loved it first. DOGBERRY Come, bring away the plaintiffs. By this time our sexton hath reformed Signior Leonato of 265 the matter. And, masters, do not forget to specify, when time and place shall serve, that I am an ass. VERGES Here, here comes Master Signior Leonato, and the Sexton too.	Needless to say, Claudio feels pretty horrible after realizing Hero was innocent all along. Dogberry orders the accused away (though he wrongly calls them the plaintiffs), and says sexton has gone to tell Leonato everything. He also reminds everyone that Borachio and Conrade called him an ass, which he wants listed among their crimes.
Enter Leonato, his brother, and the Sexton. LEONATO Which is the villain? Let me see his eyes, 270 That, when I note another man like him, I may avoid him. Which of these is he? BORACHIO If you would know your wronger, look on me. LEONATO Art thou the slave that with thy breath hast killed Mine innocent child? 275 BORACHIO Yea, even I alone. LEONATO No, not so, villain, thou beliest thyself. Here stand a pair of honorable men— A third is fled—that had a hand in it.— I thank you, princes, for my daughter’s death. 280 Record it with your high and worthy deeds. ’Twas bravely done, if you bethink you of it. CLAUDIO I know not how to pray your patience, Yet I must speak. Choose your revenge yourself. Impose me to what penance your invention 285 Can lay upon my sin. Yet sinned I not But in mistaking. PRINCE By my soul, nor I, And yet to satisfy this good old man I would bend under any heavy weight 290 That he’ll enjoin me to. LEONATO I cannot bid you bid my daughter live— That were impossible—but, I pray you both, Possess the people in Messina here How innocent she died. And if your love 295 Can labor aught in sad invention, Hang her an epitaph upon her tomb And sing it to her bones. Sing it tonight. Tomorrow morning come you to my house, And since you could not be my son-in-law, 300 Be yet my nephew. My brother hath a daughter, Almost the copy of my child that’s dead, And she alone is heir to both of us. Give her the right you should have giv’n her cousin, And so dies my revenge. 305	Leonato enters with the sexton and demands to know if Borachio is responsible for Hero’s death. When Borachio claims the fault is his alone, Leonato jumps to his defense. He says Claudio, Prince Don Pedro, and Don John are equally to blame. Then he thanks Don Pedro and Claudio for their roles in all this villainy, which probably makes them feel pretty bad. Claudio feels horrible. He says Leonato can have any revenge desired, though he’s quick to point out that his only actual sin was mistaking what he saw. Don Pedro says, "Yeah. Me, too." In terms of punishment, Leonato says they can't bring Hero back, but they can earn his forgiveness by explaining to the people of Messina that Hero was actually innocent. Also, they need to hang an epitaph on Hero's tomb, and tomorrow, Claudio must go to Leonato's and marry his niece, who looks almost just like Hero. Hmm...
CLAUDIO O, noble sir! Your overkindness doth wring tears from me. I do embrace your offer and dispose For henceforth of poor Claudio. LEONATO Tomorrow then I will expect your coming. 310 Tonight I take my leave. This naughty man Shall face to face be brought to Margaret, Who I believe was packed in all this wrong, Hired to it by your brother. BORACHIO No, by my soul, she was not, 315 Nor knew not what she did when she spoke to me, But always hath been just and virtuous In anything that I do know by her.	Claudio agrees to marry this other random niece, and thanks Leonato copiously for his kindness. Leonato will expect them all in the morning for Wedding 2.0. In the meantime, he’s off to question Hero’s maid, Margaret, who was likely involved in this whole conspiracy. Borachio speaks up again, saying Margaret had no idea what she was doing, she wasn’t involved in the plot, and is a just and virtuous girl.
DOGBERRY, to Leonato Moreover, sir, which indeed is not under white and black, this plaintiff here, the 320 offender, did call me ass. I beseech you, let it be remembered in his punishment. And also the watch heard them talk of one Deformed. They say he wears a key in his ear and a lock hanging by it and borrows money in God’s name, the which he hath 325 used so long and never paid that now men grow hardhearted and will lend nothing for God’s sake. Pray you, examine him upon that point. LEONATO I thank thee for thy care and honest pains. DOGBERRY Your Worship speaks like a most thankful 330 and reverent youth, and I praise God for you. LEONATO, giving him money There’s for thy pains. DOGBERRY God save the foundation. LEONATO Go, I discharge thee of thy prisoner, and I thank thee. 335 DOGBERRY I leave an arrant knave with your Worship, which I beseech your Worship to correct yourself, for the example of others. God keep your Worship! I wish your Worship well. God restore you to health. I humbly give you leave to depart, and if a 340 merry meeting may be wished, God prohibit it.— Come, neighbor. Dogberry and Verges exit. LEONATO Until tomorrow morning, lords, farewell. LEONATO’S BROTHER Farewell, my lords. We look for you tomorrow. PRINCE We will not fail. 345 CLAUDIO Tonight I’ll mourn with Hero. LEONATO, to Watch Bring you these fellows on.—We’ll talk with Margaret, How her acquaintance grew with this lewd fellow. They exit.	Dogberry addresses everyone, and reminds them he’s been called an ass, which he’d like to have added to the list of Borachio and Conrade’s crimes. Also, this guy named "Deformed" is still on the loose. (This goes back to the conversation between Borachio and Conrade that Dogberry misheard in Act 3, Scene 3.) Dogberry putzes around some more like a tiresome fool, and finally leaves Leonato alone to punish the prisoners as he sees fit. Don Pedro and Claudio promise they’ll see Antonio and Leonato at the wedding tomorrow morning; tonight they’ll be busy mourning at Hero’s tomb. In the meantime, Leonato will busy himself finding out the details of Margaret’s relationship with Borachio.

Original Text

Translated Text

Enter Leonato and his brother.

LEONATO’S BROTHER
If you go on thus, you will kill yourself,
And ’tis not wisdom thus to second grief
Against yourself.

LEONATO I pray thee, cease thy counsel,
Which falls into mine ears as profitless 5
As water in a sieve. Give not me counsel,
Nor let no comforter delight mine ear
But such a one whose wrongs do suit with mine.
Bring me a father that so loved his child,
Whose joy of her is overwhelmed like mine, 10
And bid him speak of patience.
Measure his woe the length and breadth of mine,
And let it answer every strain for strain,
As thus for thus, and such a grief for such,
In every lineament, branch, shape, and form. 15
If such a one will smile and stroke his beard,
Bid sorrow wag, cry “hem” when he should
groan,
Patch grief with proverbs, make misfortune drunk
With candle-wasters, bring him yet to me, 20
And I of him will gather patience.
But there is no such man. For, brother, men
Can counsel and speak comfort to that grief
Which they themselves not feel, but tasting it,
Their counsel turns to passion, which before 25
Would give preceptial med’cine to rage,
Fetter strong madness in a silken thread,
Charm ache with air and agony with words.
No, no, ’tis all men’s office to speak patience
To those that wring under the load of sorrow, 30
But no man’s virtue nor sufficiency
To be so moral when he shall endure
The like himself. Therefore give me no counsel.
My griefs cry louder than advertisement.

LEONATO’S BROTHER
Therein do men from children nothing differ. 35

LEONATO
I pray thee, peace. I will be flesh and blood,
For there was never yet philosopher
That could endure the toothache patiently,
However they have writ the style of gods
And made a push at chance and sufferance. 40

Leonato's Brother, Antonio, confronts the grieving Leonato and pleads with him not to be so suicidal.

Leonato claims his brother can say nothing to make him happy again—he can only be consoled by someone who's gone through exactly what he's going through right now.

He also says it's easy for people who have it good to give advice, which is more of him telling his brother, "You have no idea how I feel, so stop trying to tell me what to do."

Leonato's main point here is that he feels perfectly justified in crying. After all, even philosophers, for all their philosophizing, whine when they have a toothache.

LEONATO’S BROTHER
Yet bend not all the harm upon yourself.
Make those that do offend you suffer too.

LEONATO
There thou speak’st reason. Nay, I will do so.
My soul doth tell me Hero is belied,
And that shall Claudio know; so shall the Prince 45
And all of them that thus dishonor her.

Antonio points out that Leonato is justified in his suffering, but he shouldn't suffer alone. He should share his suffering with the people who are responsible for it. (Basically, go beat Hero's accusers to a pulp.)

Leonato agrees.

Enter Prince and Claudio.

LEONATO’S BROTHER
Here comes the Prince and Claudio hastily.

PRINCE
Good e’en, good e’en.

CLAUDIO Good day to both of you.

LEONATO
Hear you, my lords— 50

PRINCE We have some haste,
Leonato.

LEONATO
Some haste, my lord! Well, fare you well, my lord.
Are you so hasty now? Well, all is one.

PRINCE
Nay, do not quarrel with us, good old man. 55

LEONATO’S BROTHER
If he could right himself with quarrelling,
Some of us would lie low.

CLAUDIO Who wrongs him?

LEONATO
Marry, thou dost wrong me, thou dissembler, thou.
Nay, never lay thy hand upon thy sword. 60
I fear thee not.

CLAUDIO Marry, beshrew my hand
If it should give your age such cause of fear.
In faith, my hand meant nothing to my sword.

LEONATO
Tush, tush, man, never fleer and jest at me. 65
I speak not like a dotard nor a fool,
As under privilege of age to brag
What I have done being young, or what would do
Were I not old. Know, Claudio, to thy head,
Thou hast so wronged mine innocent child and me 70
That I am forced to lay my reverence by,
And with gray hairs and bruise of many days
Do challenge thee to trial of a man.
I say thou hast belied mine innocent child.
Thy slander hath gone through and through her 75
heart,
And she lies buried with her ancestors,
O, in a tomb where never scandal slept,
Save this of hers, framed by thy villainy.

When Claudio and Don Pedro wander on to the scene, Leonato tries to pick a fight with them, but they claim to be in a hurry to go somewhere.

Leonato thinks he sees Claudio put his hand on his sword and declares, "I'm not scared of you!"

Claudio explains that Leonato is mistaken. He wasn't reaching for his sword, and he’s not really interested in beating up senior citizens.

Leonato says that he may be old, but he’s still a mean swordsman and he's ready to fight.

He says that Claudio has no choice but to lay aside the gentle reverence of elderly people. Claudio has wrongly framed his child, and sent her to the family tomb, borne by false scandal, and Leonato is ready to fight him on her behalf.

CLAUDIO
My villainy? 80

LEONATO Thine, Claudio, thine, I say.

PRINCE
You say not right, old man.

LEONATO My lord, my lord,
I’ll prove it on his body if he dare,
Despite his nice fence and his active practice, 85
His May of youth and bloom of lustihood.

CLAUDIO
Away! I will not have to do with you.

LEONATO
Canst thou so daff me? Thou hast killed my child.
If thou kill’st me, boy, thou shalt kill a man.

LEONATO’S BROTHER
He shall kill two of us, and men indeed, 90
But that’s no matter. Let him kill one first.
Win me and wear me! Let him answer me.—
Come, follow me, boy. Come, sir boy, come, follow
me.
Sir boy, I’ll whip you from your foining fence, 95
Nay, as I am a gentleman, I will.

LEONATO Brother—

LEONATO’S BROTHER
Content yourself. God knows I loved my niece,
And she is dead, slandered to death by villains
That dare as well answer a man indeed 100
As I dare take a serpent by the tongue.—
Boys, apes, braggarts, jacks, milksops!

LEONATO Brother Anthony—

Claudio is surprised that he's being accused of doing anything wrong.

He swears didn’t lie about Hero, and only charged her with things he had proof of.

But Leonato and Antonio—especially Antonio—are really itching for a fight on behalf of Hero’s honor. (You know someone's pretty angry when they go all the way to "milksop.")

LEONATO’S BROTHER
Hold you content. What, man! I know them, yea,
And what they weigh, even to the utmost scruple— 105
Scambling, outfacing, fashionmonging boys,
That lie and cog and flout, deprave and slander,
Go anticly and show outward hideousness,
And speak off half a dozen dang’rous words
How they might hurt their enemies, if they durst, 110
And this is all.

LEONATO But brother Anthony—

LEONATO’S BROTHER Come, ’tis no matter.
Do not you meddle. Let me deal in this.

PRINCE
Gentlemen both, we will not wake your patience. 115
My heart is sorry for your daughter’s death,
But, on my honor, she was charged with nothing
But what was true and very full of proof.

LEONATO My lord, my lord—

PRINCE I will not hear you. 120

LEONATO
No? Come, brother, away. I will be heard.

LEONATO’S BROTHER
And shall, or some of us will smart for it.

Leonato and his brother exit.

Antonio declares he knows these young boys. They’re the types who go around threatening others, and generally trying to seem really tough, but they’re just full of hot air.

Prince Don Pedro attempts to diffuse the situation; he says he’s sorry for Hero’s death, but the men need to realize that the accusation against Hero was proven true. Don Pedro refuses to hear Leonato’s appeals.

Leonato and Antonio leave, spitting out a whirlwind of threats.

Enter Benedick.

PRINCE
See, see, here comes the man we went to seek.

CLAUDIO Now, signior, what news?

BENEDICK, to Prince Good day, my lord. 125

PRINCE Welcome, signior. You are almost come to
part almost a fray.

CLAUDIO We had like to have had our two noses
snapped off with two old men without teeth.

PRINCE Leonato and his brother. What think’st thou? 130
Had we fought, I doubt we should have been too
young for them.

BENEDICK In a false quarrel there is no true valor. I
came to seek you both.

CLAUDIO We have been up and down to seek thee, for 135
we are high-proof melancholy and would fain have
it beaten away. Wilt thou use thy wit?

BENEDICK It is in my scabbard. Shall I draw it?

PRINCE Dost thou wear thy wit by thy side?

CLAUDIO Never any did so, though very many have 140
been beside their wit. I will bid thee draw, as we do
the minstrels: draw to pleasure us.

PRINCE As I am an honest man, he looks pale.—Art
thou sick, or angry?

CLAUDIO, to Benedick What, courage, man! What 145
though care killed a cat? Thou hast mettle enough
in thee to kill care.

BENEDICK Sir, I shall meet your wit in the career, an
you charge it against me. I pray you, choose another
subject. 150

CLAUDIO, to Prince Nay, then, give him another staff.
This last was broke ’cross.

PRINCE By this light, he changes more and more. I
think he be angry indeed.

CLAUDIO If he be, he knows how to turn his girdle. 155

BENEDICK Shall I speak a word in your ear?

CLAUDIO God bless me from a challenge!

BENEDICK, aside to Claudio You are a villain. I jest
not. I will make it good how you dare, with what you
dare, and when you dare. Do me right, or I will 160
protest your cowardice. You have killed a sweet
lady, and her death shall fall heavy on you. Let me
hear from you.

Don Pedro and Claudio seem unfazed by the encounter. They tell Benedick they narrowly avoided a fight with two old, toothless men. Then they say they came to find Benedick to lighten their spirits.

Benedick, however, is all business.

They tease that Benedick looks rather angry, but they don’t get just how angry until Benedick pulls Claudio aside and tells him what’s what in a rather threatening way.

Benedick calmly asserts that Claudio is a villain and is responsible for the wrongful death of Hero. He challenges Claudio to a duel and says that if Claudio backs down, Benedick will declare him a coward.

CLAUDIO Well, I will meet you, so I may have good
cheer. 165

PRINCE What, a feast, a feast?

CLAUDIO I’ faith, I thank him. He hath bid me to a
calf’s head and a capon, the which if I do not carve
most curiously, say my knife’s naught. Shall I not
find a woodcock too? 170

BENEDICK Sir, your wit ambles well; it goes easily.
PRINCE I’ll tell thee how Beatrice praised thy wit the
other day. I said thou hadst a fine wit. “True,” said
she, “a fine little one.” “No,” said I, “a great wit.”
“Right,” says she, “a great gross one.” “Nay,” said I, 175
“a good wit.” “Just,” said she, “it hurts nobody.”
“Nay,” said I, “the gentleman is wise.” “Certain,”
said she, “a wise gentleman.” “Nay,” said I, “he
hath the tongues.” “That I believe,” said she, “for he
swore a thing to me on Monday night which he 180
forswore on Tuesday morning; there’s a double
tongue, there’s two tongues.” Thus did she an hour
together transshape thy particular virtues. Yet at
last she concluded with a sigh, thou wast the
proper’st man in Italy. 185

CLAUDIO For the which she wept heartily and said she
cared not.

PRINCE Yea, that she did. But yet for all that, an if she
did not hate him deadly, she would love him
dearly. The old man’s daughter told us all. 190

CLAUDIO All, all. And, moreover, God saw him when
he was hid in the garden.

PRINCE But when shall we set the savage bull’s horns
on the sensible Benedick’s head?

CLAUDIO Yea, and text underneath: “Here dwells Benedick, 195
the married man”?

Claudio doesn’t seem to take Benedick’s threat very seriously. Claudio makes light of the situation, vaguely saying to Don Pedro that Benedick has accused him of being all kinds of stupid.

Don Pedro and Claudio then launch into a series of silly taunts about Beatrice’s love for Benedick, which they claim they heard from Hero (who is to their knowledge, dead, so they’re being pretty insensitive).

Finally, they ridicule Benedick, saying that when he marries Beatrice, he’ll be hung with cuckold’s horns, though he claimed to once be an untameable bull.

BENEDICK Fare you well, boy. You know my mind. I
will leave you now to your gossip-like humor. You
break jests as braggarts do their blades, which, God
be thanked, hurt not.—My lord, for your many 200
courtesies I thank you. I must discontinue your
company. Your brother the Bastard is fled from
Messina. You have among you killed a sweet and
innocent lady. For my Lord Lackbeard there, he and
I shall meet, and till then peace be with him. 205

Benedick exits.

Benedick isn't amused. He says the men may be full of jokes now, but they’re like braggarts who talk big, but don’t know how to use a sword.

He then thanks the Prince for his many courtesies, but he says he’ll have to part ways with him from here on out, adding, "Oh, by the way, your brother has fled the city, and all three of you are responsible for Hero's death. Ta ta."

PRINCE He is in earnest.

CLAUDIO In most profound earnest, and, I’ll warrant
you, for the love of Beatrice.

PRINCE And hath challenged thee?

CLAUDIO Most sincerely. 210

PRINCE What a pretty thing man is when he goes in his
doublet and hose and leaves off his wit!

CLAUDIO He is then a giant to an ape; but then is an ape
a doctor to such a man.

PRINCE But soft you, let me be. Pluck up, my heart, 215
and be sad. Did he not say my brother was fled?

Enter Constables Dogberry and Verges, and the Watch,
with Conrade and Borachio.

Prince Don Pedro and Claudio are left alone to wonder at all this very serious business from Benedick. He seems to be earnest in his love for Beatrice and his challenge on Claudio’s life, which is way more seriousness than they're used to from him.

As Don Pedro wonders about why his brother suddenly skipped town, Dogberry and company enter to clear up the matter...maybe.

DOGBERRY Come you, sir. If justice cannot tame you,
she shall ne’er weigh more reasons in her balance.
Nay, an you be a cursing hypocrite once, you must
be looked to. 220

PRINCE How now, two of my brother’s men bound?
Borachio one!

CLAUDIO Hearken after their offense, my lord.

PRINCE Officers, what offense have these men done?

DOGBERRY Marry, sir, they have committed false 225
report; moreover, they have spoken untruths;
secondarily, they are slanders; sixth and lastly, they
have belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust
things; and, to conclude, they are lying knaves.

PRINCE First, I ask thee what they have done; thirdly, I 230
ask thee what’s their offense; sixth and lastly, why
they are committed; and, to conclude, what you lay
to their charge.

CLAUDIO Rightly reasoned, and in his own division;
and, by my troth, there’s one meaning well suited. 235

PRINCE, to Borachio and Conrade Who have you offended,
masters, that you are thus bound to your
answer? This learned constable is too cunning to be
understood. What’s your offense?

Prince Don Pedro recognizes Conrade and Borachio as the henchmen of his brother, Don John. He wonders at what offense the men committed in order to be brought forth in chains.

Dogberry, as usual, muddles his explanation.

After playing with Dogberry for a bit, Don Pedro finally asks Borachio and Conrade what they've done.

BORACHIO Sweet prince, let me go no farther to mine 240
answer. Do you hear me, and let this count kill me.
I have deceived even your very eyes. What your
wisdoms could not discover, these shallow fools
have brought to light, who in the night overheard
me confessing to this man how Don John your 245
brother incensed me to slander the Lady Hero, how
you were brought into the orchard and saw me
court Margaret in Hero’s garments, how you disgraced
her when you should marry her. My villainy
they have upon record, which I had rather seal with 250
my death than repeat over to my shame. The lady is
dead upon mine and my master’s false accusation.
And, briefly, I desire nothing but the reward of a
villain.

PRINCE, to Claudio
Runs not this speech like iron through your blood? 255

CLAUDIO
I have drunk poison whiles he uttered it.

PRINCE, to Borachio
But did my brother set thee on to this?

BORACHIO Yea, and paid me richly for the practice of
it.

PRINCE
He is composed and framed of treachery, 260
And fled he is upon this villainy.

Borachio breaks the mood of merriment, and reveals the truth, even though he’s scared Claudio will kill him.

Borachio says he would have gotten away with the scheme if it hadn't been for the Scooby gang. The watchmen heard him brag to Conrade about the counterfeit scene where Borachio courted Margaret, who posed as Hero.

Borachio admits this very scene was at the root of many evils: Hero’s undoing, Claudio’s denouncement of Hero, and Hero’s subsequent death. He's actually really sorry and says he deserves to be punished.

Prince Don Pedro and Claudio are shocked, and Don Pedro asks again for confirmation that this was all Don John’s doing.

Borachio admits he was paid handsomely by Don John for his wrongdoing. Now Don Pedro understands why Don John was so quick to skip town.

CLAUDIO
Sweet Hero, now thy image doth appear
In the rare semblance that I loved it first.

DOGBERRY Come, bring away the plaintiffs. By this
time our sexton hath reformed Signior Leonato of 265
the matter. And, masters, do not forget to specify,
when time and place shall serve, that I am an ass.

VERGES Here, here comes Master Signior Leonato,
and the Sexton too.

Needless to say, Claudio feels pretty horrible after realizing Hero was innocent all along.

Dogberry orders the accused away (though he wrongly calls them the plaintiffs), and says sexton has gone to tell Leonato everything.

He also reminds everyone that Borachio and Conrade called him an ass, which he wants listed among their crimes.

Enter Leonato, his brother, and the Sexton.

LEONATO
Which is the villain? Let me see his eyes, 270
That, when I note another man like him,
I may avoid him. Which of these is he?

BORACHIO
If you would know your wronger, look on me.

LEONATO
Art thou the slave that with thy breath hast killed
Mine innocent child? 275

BORACHIO Yea, even I alone.

LEONATO
No, not so, villain, thou beliest thyself.
Here stand a pair of honorable men—
A third is fled—that had a hand in it.—
I thank you, princes, for my daughter’s death. 280
Record it with your high and worthy deeds.
’Twas bravely done, if you bethink you of it.

CLAUDIO
I know not how to pray your patience,
Yet I must speak. Choose your revenge yourself.
Impose me to what penance your invention 285
Can lay upon my sin. Yet sinned I not
But in mistaking.

PRINCE By my soul, nor I,
And yet to satisfy this good old man
I would bend under any heavy weight 290
That he’ll enjoin me to.

LEONATO
I cannot bid you bid my daughter live—
That were impossible—but, I pray you both,
Possess the people in Messina here
How innocent she died. And if your love 295
Can labor aught in sad invention,
Hang her an epitaph upon her tomb
And sing it to her bones. Sing it tonight.
Tomorrow morning come you to my house,
And since you could not be my son-in-law, 300
Be yet my nephew. My brother hath a daughter,
Almost the copy of my child that’s dead,
And she alone is heir to both of us.
Give her the right you should have giv’n her cousin,
And so dies my revenge. 305

Leonato enters with the sexton and demands to know if Borachio is responsible for Hero’s death.

When Borachio claims the fault is his alone, Leonato jumps to his defense. He says Claudio, Prince Don Pedro, and Don John are equally to blame. Then he thanks Don Pedro and Claudio for their roles in all this villainy, which probably makes them feel pretty bad.

Claudio feels horrible. He says Leonato can have any revenge desired, though he’s quick to point out that his only actual sin was mistaking what he saw.

Don Pedro says, "Yeah. Me, too."

In terms of punishment, Leonato says they can't bring Hero back, but they can earn his forgiveness by explaining to the people of Messina that Hero was actually innocent.

Also, they need to hang an epitaph on Hero's tomb, and tomorrow, Claudio must go to Leonato's and marry his niece, who looks almost just like Hero. Hmm...

CLAUDIO O, noble sir!
Your overkindness doth wring tears from me.
I do embrace your offer and dispose
For henceforth of poor Claudio.

LEONATO
Tomorrow then I will expect your coming. 310
Tonight I take my leave. This naughty man
Shall face to face be brought to Margaret,
Who I believe was packed in all this wrong,
Hired to it by your brother.

BORACHIO No, by my soul, she was not, 315
Nor knew not what she did when she spoke to me,
But always hath been just and virtuous
In anything that I do know by her.

Claudio agrees to marry this other random niece, and thanks Leonato copiously for his kindness.

Leonato will expect them all in the morning for Wedding 2.0. In the meantime, he’s off to question Hero’s maid, Margaret, who was likely involved in this whole conspiracy.

Borachio speaks up again, saying Margaret had no idea what she was doing, she wasn’t involved in the plot, and is a just and virtuous girl.

DOGBERRY, to Leonato Moreover, sir, which indeed is
not under white and black, this plaintiff here, the 320
offender, did call me ass. I beseech you, let it be
remembered in his punishment. And also the watch
heard them talk of one Deformed. They say he
wears a key in his ear and a lock hanging by it and
borrows money in God’s name, the which he hath 325
used so long and never paid that now men grow
hardhearted and will lend nothing for God’s sake.
Pray you, examine him upon that point.

LEONATO I thank thee for thy care and honest pains.

DOGBERRY Your Worship speaks like a most thankful 330
and reverent youth, and I praise God for you.

LEONATO, giving him money There’s for thy pains.

DOGBERRY God save the foundation.

LEONATO Go, I discharge thee of thy prisoner, and I
thank thee. 335

DOGBERRY I leave an arrant knave with your Worship,
which I beseech your Worship to correct
yourself, for the example of others. God keep your
Worship! I wish your Worship well. God restore you
to health. I humbly give you leave to depart, and if a 340
merry meeting may be wished, God prohibit it.—
Come, neighbor.

Dogberry and Verges exit.

LEONATO
Until tomorrow morning, lords, farewell.

LEONATO’S BROTHER
Farewell, my lords. We look for you tomorrow.

PRINCE
We will not fail. 345

CLAUDIO Tonight I’ll mourn with Hero.

LEONATO, to Watch
Bring you these fellows on.—We’ll talk with
Margaret,
How her acquaintance grew with this lewd fellow.

They exit.

Dogberry addresses everyone, and reminds them he’s been called an ass, which he’d like to have added to the list of Borachio and Conrade’s crimes.

Also, this guy named "Deformed" is still on the loose. (This goes back to the conversation between Borachio and Conrade that Dogberry misheard in Act 3, Scene 3.)

Dogberry putzes around some more like a tiresome fool, and finally leaves Leonato alone to punish the prisoners as he sees fit.

Don Pedro and Claudio promise they’ll see Antonio and Leonato at the wedding tomorrow morning; tonight they’ll be busy mourning at Hero’s tomb.

In the meantime, Leonato will busy himself finding out the details of Margaret’s relationship with Borachio.

Much Ado About Nothing: Act 5, Scene 1 Translation

A side-by-side translation of Act 5, Scene 1 of Much Ado About Nothing from the original Shakespeare into modern English.

Original Text

Translated Text

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