Beginning: The True Meaning of Smekday
- When Gratuity is assigned an essay at school, asking her to define the meaning of Smekday, she's not sure where to start.
- The winning essay will get put in a time capsule to be opened one hundred years from now. Won't they already know about Smekday by then?
- Still, it's a school assignment, so Gratuity doesn't really have a choice. She sits down to write about when it all began: Moving Day.
- Moving Day is just what it sounds like—a day for, um, moving—but instead of say, a family moving, a whole bunch of people were forced to move… and now the day is a national holiday.
- Gratuity fills us in on a little back story. She's been living by herself and driving herself around since her mom left, and while it wasn't easy at first, she's learned along the way.
- On Moving Day, Gratuity decides to drive down to Florida, even though she lives in Pennsylvania, since that's where everyone is going.
- Most people are taking the rocket-pods down there. This makes Gratuity feel a little uncomfortable, though, and she'd rather take the highway by herself; figuring she might get lonely, Gratuity decides to take her cat, Pig, along for the journey.
- It's not long before Gratuity and Pig run into some bubbles and a guy in a clear plastic radiation suit.
- Well, when we say guy, we really mean a Boov. Or, we should say, a lump with tiny arms and many legs.
- The Boov motions for Gratuity to stop, but she doesn't want to—these aliens are nothing but bad news—so instead she steps on the gas.
- It looks like the Boov really wants her to stop, because he takes out his invisible gun and shatters the mirror. Uh oh…
- Muttering that she hates them under her breath, Gratuity pulls over. What other choice does she have?
- She also notices that she's got a flat tire. The only problem is, she doesn't know how to change one.
- Gratuity remembers her mom keeps an emergency cell phone in the glove box… but who's she going to call?
- She sees a MoPo convenience store, so she decides to go in.
- While she's in there, Gratuity hears someone—or should we say, something—talking to Pig. It's the Boov.
- Gratuity decides to make a break for it and starts running away.
- Just then, though, the Boov calls out after her, assuring her he won't hurt her.
- Quick on her feet, Gratuity pushes the Boov inside a freezer and bars the door shut with a broom.
- The Boov is confused. Why would she do this?
- Gratuity says it's because he stole her mom. Wait, what? We're not sure what she means, but there's no time to explain because the Boov decides to start shooting his way out of the freezer with his laser eyes.
- Gratuity gets scared, especially when the lasers get closer and closer. The Boov tells her he will shoot her with the lasers, but she promises to explode his head if he does.
- Too bad the Boov's never played poker, because he doesn't know Gratuity is just bluffing.
- They decide to call a truce so there's no head-exploding or eye lasers for either of them, then the Boov offers to fix Gratuity's car. She thinks this is a joke. After all, how could he—an alien—fix her car?
- Still, she doesn't know much about cars, so she steps back to watch him work. He claims to be a Chief Maintenance Office who can fix everything.
- Gratuity waits while the Boov works. When she comments that he's been working for a long time for just a flat tire, he's shocked. What flat tire?
- The Boov doesn't understand why the car would need a tire to hover, since that's what cars do where he's from.
- Gratuity gets annoyed with him quickly. Who does this guy think he is?
- The Boov did fix the car, though. So what if it has a big sign from the convenience store on it now? It officially floats.
- There's nothing left to do but jet off to Florida. The Boov calls the car "wicked"—as in "cool"—which Gratuity thinks is weird since no one says that anymore. No one except her mom, that is.
- The Boov eats some dental floss and tells Gratuity she's pronouncing Boov wrong. It's Bo-o-ov. Duh.
- Then he introduces himself as J.Lo. That's not his real name, of course, but to pronounce it properly, Gratuity would need two heads. Um, okay—whatever you say, J.Lo.
- J.Lo is the guy's Smek name. Oh, and Captain Smek renamed Earth when they took over, so now it's called Smekland.
- Gratuity gets annoyed at this—they can't just rename a whole planet—but J.Lo explains that they actually landed here a "long time ago."
- Gratuity's not buying it, though; they landed last Christmas, or Smekday.
- And that brings us to the end of Gratuity's essay. She tells us this is when she first learned what Smekday was.
- Next up, we get a little note from Gratuity's teacher.
- She says the style is interesting, but the essay doesn't really fit the assignment.
- Gratuity's teacher reminds her that one hundred years from now, people won't know what the invasion was like, so she should write about what it was like before the Boov came.
- Gratuity gets a C+, but she's allowed to rewrite it for extra credit.