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Florist

Bell Curve

1
5%

Those flowers for the Morgan Wedding were so late that they were just in time for the golden anniversary. It is a good thing that you know how to arrange flowers for funerals… because your job is dead!

2
25%

“With Deepest Sympathy” cards were not meant for the flowers for the Cleary Wedding. “Congratulations” did not work so well for the Wong funeral. “Get Well Soon” cards stuck into those bouquets will not help the sickly, wilted flowers any more than they will show your employer that you know anything about floral design. Better turn it around soon. Put the petal to the metal.

3
50%

Plenty of Easter lilies sold last Easter. Plenty of poinsettias sold last Christmas. Plenty of Dutch iris sold last Squirrel Appreciation Day, though no one can really explain how you did it. You will probably sell just as many saguaro cactus flowers on Corn on the Cob Day. Your employer likes what he sees.

4
75%

Who needs all these silly holidays? You can make up new holidays as you go! Besides, people do not need excuses to come from miles around to buy flowers and flower arrangements from you. Your employer is planning a long vacation, but is not yet planning to come back. Doesn’t that qualify as retirement?

5
95%

The Netherlands must outsource to grow enough flowers for your several floral design studios. Your designs are as revered as the sculptures of Rodin…they just don’t last as long. Revenue is great! Work is fun! Everything is coming up roses!. Ah, the sweet smell of…chrysanthemums.

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