How we cite our quotes: (Chapter.Paragraph)
Quote #1
I'd never had the feeling before, and I haven't really had it since. I don't mean to say that I'd been unhappy. It was more that there had always been something wrong before, somewhere—something to worry about. (And, as you'll see, there's been a fair bit to worry about since, but we'll get to that.) For instance, my parents were getting divorced, and they were fighting. (1.5)
Sam's family life has always been filled with turmoil. It's not just that his parents got divorced; they've kept fighting long after the divorce papers were signed. Sam feels stuck in the middle of his parents and always has to navigate their anger at one another. His family life hasn't exactly been a perfect one.
Quote #2
The story of my family, as far as I can tell, is always the same story, over and over again […] Those stories make you feel as though the whole world is on its way up. But in our family, people always slip up on the first step. In fact, most of the time they don't even find the stairs. (2.21)
Even though he wouldn't admit it to anybody, Sam is embarrassed by the fact that no one in his family's really made anything of themselves. They all dropped out of school or came up short when it came to life goals, and Sam hopes to be the one to change all that. Sure, it'll be good for his own career, but it will also make his mom proud.
Quote #3
You don't have to keep a baby in your pocket if you're on the bus late at night. And if you think about it, that must tell you something, because people will mug you for anything worth having, which means that a baby can't be worth having. (2.167)
We'll admit we've never thought about comparing a baby and iPod before. It's telling that Sam thinks about a baby as something that's not valuable or worth anything. We can't say that his viewpoint changes all that much, even after Roof is born. Sam doesn't really see the point in starting at family (yet).
Quote #4
I'd never met anyone quite like Alicia's mum and dad before I started going out with Alicia, and at first I thought they were dead cool—I can even remember wishing that my mum and dad were like them. (4.13)
Everyone gets annoyed at their parents, so it's no surprise that Sam wishes he could exchange his parents as soon as he meets Alicia's. Yet it's not long before he realizes they have their own drama, too. Sure, the Burns act all perfect, but underneath the white picket fence there's anger and regret just as much as in Sam's family.
Quote #5
"Welcome to the family," said Rich.
"Don't say it like that," said Alicia. "I'll never see him again."
"They're not that bad," I said, but they were, really. And to be honest, it wasn't just Alicia's parents who were getting on my nerves either. (4.35-37)
This isn't exactly the welcome wagon Sam had hoped for. He knows Alicia's family thinks he's a deadbeat without a future, and it bugs him. He also feels frustrated with Alicia by this point—this is the start of his problems with Alicia.
Quote #6
"I'm sorry, but I'll be talking to my son in private for the rest of my life if that's what he and I want to do. And we're not family. Not now, and maybe not ever. Sam will always do what's right, and so will I, but if you think that allows you to come into my house and demand the right to hear my private conversations, then you've got another thing coming." (9.317)
You go, girl. Sam's mom has no trouble telling Alicia's dad how it is. When he insists that everything should be shared now that they are family, Sam's mom puts him in his place. They aren't family. Just because their kids are having a baby together doesn't mean they've all signed up to be family members for the rest of their lives.
Quote #7
But this baby wasn't my baby, she was my little sister, and nothing about her was going to make me feel sad or worried. I wanted to know her name. (12.7)
Emily changes things for Sam. He doesn't worry about the pregnancy, or what will happen in the way he does about his own kid. In fact, he's excited to be a big brother. He loves Emily right away, no questions asked. Sam learns a lot about the meaning of family by checking out his own in the future.
Quote #8
Suddenly, my mum wasn't my mum anymore. We were friends who'd got themselves into the same stupid place in the same year. It was a weird time in my life, really, if you threw the trips to the future in there as well. Nothing was fixed properly. (13.56)
When she's pregnant, Sam's mom changes. No, we're not talking about that change—we mean she becomes more like a pal to Sam and less like a parent. She realizes he's growing up now, and their relationship shifts. Sam starts to share with her in a different way, too.
Quote #9
"So," said Alicia. "Here we are, Roof. Mummy and Daddy. This is your whole family." And she laughed. She was excited. My lunch started to shift around in my stomach, as if it wanted to go home with Mum and Mark. (15.23)
Alicia is set on making sure Rufus comes home to a loving and supportive family, even if one doesn't officially exist. Her attempts at making the perfect family for Roof are almost comical, considering she and Sam are on-again, off-again and don't even know where they stand. Eventually she realizes that family isn't about a mom and a dad living together.
Quote #10
"It's just a family, isn't it?"
"A family where everyone's the wrong age."
"Oh, don't be so stuffy. There's no such thing as a right age." (19.12-14)
Mark and Sam's mom chat about the meaning of family, and we can tell that we're being asked to think about it, too. Here, she's clear that families come in all shapes and sizes. It's not about specifics like age or marriage. It's about love and commitment. That's really what makes them a family.