Chapter 5
- Georgia and her friends learn that their brother school, Foxwood, will be hosting a Christmas dance… but then they find out the Stiff Dylans will be performing.
- Since Georgia and Jas aren't on the best terms with Robbie and Tom, they question whether they should even go.
- Miss Wilson, who teaches religious education, lectures her class about hygiene. Scrub your pits, yo.
- Jas comes over for a sleepover, and she and Georgia spy on Mark as he makes out with a girl. Libby joins in on the spying.
- Oops—Mark almost catches the three of them when he looks up at the window.
- The next morning, Jas and Georgia run into Mark on the street; Jas leaves Georgia and Mark alone.
- He asks Georgia if she has a boyfriend. She tells him she just got out of a relationship and is giving herself some space.
- He then proceeds to rest his hand on her breast, because that's the logical progression of things. And then he goes to school.
- Georgia is grateful when she doesn't run into Mark on the way home, though she does think that the boy who rested his hand on her breast should maybe pay her a visit.
- There's a knock on Georgia's door later on, and when she answers it, she finds Mark, who charmingly says, "I've dumped Ella, do you want to go to the Stiff Dylans gig?" (5.515).
- Georgia agrees to go.
- She isn't so sure she actually wants to go, but Mark leaves her a note saying when and where they're going to meet, so now she kind of has to—you know, since she can't contact him to cancel.
- Uh-oh… It's serious-talk-with-the-parents time. Georgia's dad tells her he's going to New Zealand right after Christmas to start looking for work there, and once he finds a job, the whole family will join him.
- Georgia and her parents argue about the possible move. All of her friends are here in England so Georgia doesn't want to leave. Libby joins the rest of the family, but instead of contributing to the conversation, she manages to dress Angus up as a baby without getting her face ripped off.
- A day or so passes and Georgia sees tender moments shared between Mum, Dad, and Libby. Dad is very affectionate toward Mum, and gets emotional when Libby sings her version of "Jingle Bells." He almost cries, and then actually does when Libby sticks her finger in his eye. How does anyone in this family still have their eyeballs with this kid and the cat?
- Georgia reads an article in Cosmo called "What men say and what they mean." Based on the article, Georgia decides she could be a writer for this lady rag because you don't have to make any sense at all.
- Rosie, another of Georgia's friends, asks Sven, a foreign exchange student, to go to the Stiff Dylans gig. He doesn't speak a lot of English, but she managed to ask him out by pointing at him, then herself, and then doing a little dance. Rosie makes it look so easy.
- Georgia thinks more about Mark. Should she let him kiss her? What does the hand on the breast mean? She knows he's not very smart, but he could become a famous footballer and then if they get married she'll live in luxury. Way to play the long game, girl.
- Then she gets concerned about being in tabloids, and particularly worries about her nose in the photos. She decides she can't marry him after all because of all the pressure she's already feeling. How does Victoria Beckham do it?
- Georgia tells us about the dance once she's home. She met Mark at the clock tower and he laid a wet one on her.
- When they arrived, Mark went to talk to some of his mates, and Georgia hung out with Jas and Rosie.
- Tom and Robbie entered.
- Robbie smiled at Georgia and she smiled back, only to realize he was actually smiling at Lindsay behind her. Because of course that's what happened.
- Robbie went onstage, leaving Tom near Georgia's group. Jas wondered if she should say something to him, but then a girl came out of the bathroom and walked up to him. Tom put an arm around her and then off they went together. Sorry, Jas.
- The Stiff Dylans began their set, and Mark pulled Georgia onto the dance floor, where he proceeded to dance like a maniac, embarrassing Georgia.
- Sven joined in, pulling Rosie onto the dance floor. Sven's dancing made Georgia and her friends have a laughing fit.
- Mark pulled Georgia against him for a slow dance, but she had to bend her knees for it to work while he pressed his mouth up against her neck. She couldn't help but look at Robbie onstage.
- When the band stopped for a break, Mark yelled, "Play more," then some of his friends joined in and rushed the stage.
- A fight broke out between the band and Mark's friends, and Jas, Julia, Ellen, and Georgia made a run for it.
- Home now, several phone calls are exchanged between Georgia and her friends. Jas mostly vents, thinking she'll never get a boyfriend; when Georgia chats with Ellen, she tells Georgia that Lindsay wears an engagement ring at school.
- Jas isn't at school the next day.
- Georgia gets another note from Mark to meet him at the phone box that night.
- Georgia decides she's going to break up with Mark at their meeting, but Mark ends up beating her to it. He tells her he's back with Ella because she lets him do stuff to her. Yup, he's one classy gentleman.
- Georgia's upset about getting dumped by Mark, but then feels better after receiving ten pounds from her aunt. Remember, we're in England, so pounds are money, not just units for weight.
- Georgia runs into Robbie at the school gate and he makes a jab at her about Mark. She gets angry and decides to say something clever back: "I think you are mistaking me for someone who is interested in what you have to say" (5.609). Oh snap.
- Jas has yet to return to school. What's up with that? Georgia tries to visit her, but there's no answer at her door. She talks to Jas's mom and finds out Jas hasn't been eating.
- Jackie and Alison come up with a new stupid game that involves making yourself faint. Georgia plays the game, but just feels woozy.
- Christmas day comes, and because the family is in hard times, they keep things simple; Georgia gives her family thoughtful, homemade gifts.
- Georgia's dad is going to leave soon, so she babysits Libby while her parents go on a date. At the end of the night, they come home a little drunk; Georgia pretends to be asleep next to Libby. Mum puts Libby in her own bed, while Dad ruffles Georgia's hair—to her horror and our pulled heart strings.
- Dad leaves. Georgia admits that she cried a little bit—Mum is sad and cries a bit more, though, so Libby brings Mum Angus's bowl to cry into.