How we cite our quotes: (Part.Chapter.Paragraph)
Quote #7
But will it end with this? I ask myself. Will it let go of me? Already, I know that all of this will stay with me forever. It'll haunt me, but I also fear it will make me feel grateful. I say fear because at times I really don't want this to be a fond memory until it's over. I also fear that nothing really ends at the end. Things just keep going as long as memory can wield its ax, always finding a soft part in your mind to cut through and enter. (4.A.33)
Enter the Ace of Hearts. If Ed thought the others were tricky, he's in for a surprise, because this time the challenges hit closer to home. Ed's fears change from being scared for his life to not being sure about where he'll stand after he helps his friends out.
Quote #8
Afraid because I don't want my own funeral to be that forlorn and empty. I want words at my funeral. But I guess that means you need life in your life. (4.2.98)
At his dad's grave, Ed tells us some deep stuff. He's worried about what his life amounts to if all he ever does is act like his dad. It's a sad thought, but also one that scares him—hopefully into action.
Quote #9
"She doesn't want to love you," I tell him. "She doesn't want to love anyone. She's had a rough life, Audrey. The only people she ever loved she hated." I get some flashbacks of when we were growing up. She was hurt a lot, and she vowed it wouldn't continue that way. She wouldn't let it. (4.3.92)
Spoiler alert. Ed is shocked when Simon (Audrey's current flame) tells him this. Audrey loves him? It looks like Ed's not the only one afraid of what will happen if the truth comes out. Simon's words remind us that everyone is afraid sometimes, especially when it comes to matters of the heart.